In today’s age of fake news and media hysteria, faculty members of Christian schools must be able to both discern what is true and teach students to do the same. We live in a confusing age, a time in history when anyone and everyone has a ready-made platform from which to shout their latest musings. As educators entrusted with helping teenagers navigate this new world, it is essential that we consistently present examples of articles, podcasts, and videos at their best. By doing this, we can show students how to judge what a relevant and thoughtful opinion looks like. This skill is only made more important by the current culture of inflamed heads and underdeveloped hearts playing itself out on a national stage of finger-pointing and rage.
One major area of consistent media attention is gender. It would be far too easy for us as Christians to remove ourselves from the confusing, and at times alarming, debates about how we must think about the significant challenges being addressed. The #MeToo movement is an example of a social movement that teenagers and adolescents want to know about. Moreover, not only do students want to know about this topic, they also want to be able to think and talk with wisdom about how women have been abused by powerful men. If Christians should be the light of Christ in the darkness, we must weigh in on these topics with our students.
The New APA Guidelines
In August 2018, the American Psychological Association (APA) released new guidelines for treatment of men and boys with mental health disorders (Pappas). Stoicism and dominance, “traditional masculinity” as stated by the report, are drowning men in a sea of their own pain and leading to high numbers of suicides, homicides, and addictive behaviors (APA Guidelines, 11). In the Washington Post article “How ‘Traditional Masculinity’ Hurts the Men Who Believe in It the Most,” columnist Monica Hesse explores this new insight into how to best treat males and how to change the cultural narrative around struggling men. While many in conservative circles have dismissed both Hesse’s article and the APA’s assessment, it seems that administrators and faculty members of Christian schools should, at the very least, consider what is being debated. Whether or not we bring this debate into our classrooms, our students are thinking and forming opinions about these fiery topics.
“How ‘Traditional Masculinity’ Hurts”
The Christian world can no longer pretend to believe that the men in our midst are alright. Pornography, mental illness, and stress of all kinds are pulling men down by the bootstraps by which they are told to lift themselves up. Hesse’s article is generally well written and thoughtful, far from the critique of masculinity that I expected. Instead, Hesse speaks lovingly of her grandfather who embodied “traditional” masculinity in a way that gained both her love and her respect. She reflected on a men’s conference she had covered a few years back where she found men to be overwhelmingly depressed and sad. Throughout her stories and reflections, it seems that, if anything, she is genuine in her desire for men to flourish.
At one point in the article she asks a difficult question that is interesting and essential for explaining the problem as she sees it. After describing her experience at this men’s conference, she wondered how white males, who are clearly privileged in our society, could be complaining about the system that they built. After all, she exclaims, weren’t the Founding Fathers themselves white men? She answers the rhetorical question with a simple response: what we have is a bad system, and bad systems hurt everyone—including those who create them.
Cultural Expectations for Men
As Christian educators who work with young men on their journey into adulthood, it is appropriate to consider what secular psychologists are saying. Not long ago I was a high school student who spent more than one hockey game skating through blurry vision and a ringing head after a hard hit. As far as I was concerned, situations like those were the perfect opportunity to show off my budding manhood. Through glazed eyes, I would look into the stands to see my father’s approval at my ability to “suck it up.”
While certain cultural observers, such as David French at the National Review, are concerned with the APA’s assessment and new guidelines, I am not (French, “The APA Can’t Spin”). Looking back, high school experiences like that do not define manhood. French suggests that if we try in any way to adjust our definition of “traditional” masculinity we may put manhood and society at jeopardy.
Hesse is concerned that men are taught to carry a burden they can’t bear, and French is arguing that society needs men. My question in this debate is, Why can’t both be true? As a man with a wife and a young daughter, I know that our society desperately needs men who can lead their families and thrive in community. I also know, both from my own experience and from the experiences of friends, this type of flourishing does not just happen on its own. Skills need to be taught, confidence must be gained, and this takes time. Maybe the best solution is a society that has manhood, defined by responsibility, as the goal—but also a society that is careful about helping men get there. Without this, the weight of the goal can be crushing.
Our Role as Christian Educators
Christian teachers are in the position to help move this forward. Why is this? Because we know the ultimate man in Christ who is able to bring both the male faculty members and the boys we serve into the goal we all want to attain. My fear is that we might continue to lose sight of the right target though.
Over a half century ago, Martin Luther King Jr. observed, “Rarely do we find men who willingly engage in hard, solid thinking. There is an almost universal quest for easy answers and half-baked solutions. Nothing pains some people more than having to think.” It is far too easy to define masculinity in terms of athletics or hobbies. As Christians, we must do better for our students.
In 1 Corinthians 16:13–14, Paul exhorts the church members to “be watchful, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong. Let all that you do be done in love” (ESV). I find it interesting that Paul sees masculinity as operating out of love. In Ephesians, Paul tells the Christians there to submit to one another “out of reverence for Christ.” Far from the Americanized version of manhood that shows us a cowboy riding alone through the desert, the picture Paul, and Scripture, paints of manhood is worlds apart. Paul sees men living in community, encouraging one another, protecting their families, and above all, loving others well. The hard work of thinking that we must do for and with our students is to put this picture into twenty-first-century schools and communities. This task is not easy, but what task worth doing ever is?
Current Issues in the Classroom
Presenting the APA Guidelines, alongside the articles by Hesse and French, demonstrates one way we can educate our students on important topics using media communication. While I enjoy watching the students struggle through primary sources as much as the next guy, sometimes we must relate to students with more popular types of sources. Masculinity is a topic we should care about, and it is a topic thrown around all over social media and the podcast world. These information platforms allow us to introduce students to controversial topics from multiple sides. By reading and listening to those who have put in the hard work of thinking, students can learn to do the same.
I use wrong views of masculinity as an example because our students are being harmed by confusing messages. As the APA affirms, wrong views of masculinity are toxic. Violence, sexism, and stoic responses to suffering are not manhood. Responsibility, kindness, gentleness, and a firm defense of truth is manhood the way it was meant to be.
Manhood must be restored, and we are those entrusted with restoring it in our small communities. How do we move forward? The answer is not a simple one. Each school, each faculty member, each community must do the difficult work of thinking, application, and prayer regarding how to move forward. The rewards could be redemptive to a culture that is wondering out loud how to move forward.
Works Cited
APA Guidelines for Psychological Practice with Men and Boys. American Psychological Association, 2018. https://www.apa.org/about/policy /boys-men-practice-guidelines.pdf.
French, David. “The APA Can’t Spin Its Way Out of Its Attack on ‘Traditional Masculinity.’” National Review, January 9, 2019. https://www.nationalreview .com/2019/01/traditional-masculinity-backlash-against-new-apa-guidelines/.
Hesse, Monica. “How ‘Traditional Masculinity’ Hurts the Men Who Believe in It the Most.” January 13, 2019, https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle /style/how-traditional-masculinity -hurts-the-men-who-believe-in -it-most/2019/01/12/22d2518a-14fd -11e9-90a8-136fa44b80ba_story.html?noredirect=on&utm_term=.0f85b339c694.
King, Martin Luther, Jr. Strength to Love. New York: Harper & Row, 1963.
Pappas, Stephanie. “APA Issues First-Ever Guidelines for Practice with Men and Boys.” APA Monitor on Psychology 50, no. 1 (2019): 34. https://www.apa .org/monitor/2019/01/ce-corner.
Dennis Uhlman teaches American Government and Economics at the Ben Lippen School in Columbia, SC. Dennis serves as the Model United Nations Advisor and greatly enjoys teaching and discipling students. He lives with his wife, Stacey, and their young daughter Ruth in Columbia.